He sees me!

So, if you've been following me along in this journey of life then you'll know that one of the many adventures we have been on has included my health. In October it started with 6 weeks of swollen lymph nodes and the possibility of lymphoma. From there, the symptoms morphed and changed and have settled into pain in my rib bones and aching in my joints. Through this journey, i have embarked and yes, paid for, every medical test under the sun!
Let's see: CT scan, Echocardiogram, Pulmonary Function test, Mammogram, Sonogram, Bone Density Test and this week ... a total body Bone Scan. On top of all those SCANS .. I have had a huge range of blood work done. All praise to God, those tests ... all of them with exception to a few little blood things .. have come back NORMAL! The blood work that was off .. the "ACE" levels are now within a completely normal range. I'll give that recovery to prayer alone!

As I have walked in this journey through what felt like the wilderness on some days, I have had my days of ups and downs. I have always known in my head that the Lord knows every detail. I have known that he would either reveal or heal ... but I just didn't know when. That's the hard part of any journey with him ... we have NO CLUE of his timing! Two weeks ago, I felt so frustrated and was beginning to feel so discouraged with the lack of answers. All those things I know in my head seemed to be stuck there .. and not penetrating my heart!

I went to church on that Sunday morning and for the first time, I found myself with the inability to open my mouth during worship. As I sat and stared at the words of each song, I couldn't hold back the tears. I quickly found myself with the inability to read every word, clouded by the burred vision they brought. As I sat there, I didn't question the Lord .. nor did I question the words in those songs. But what I did do, was realize how easy it is to sing those songs and to worship him in the midst of joy. It is in the trials that we find ourselves really asking "Do I believe everything I am saying". For me, the tears came from knowing that I do ... and from realizing that so often, I worship out of joy of the blessings he has given me and not out of thankfulness for who HE IS ... all the time .... even in the midst of a wilderness!

That evening I attended one of my dearest friends "House church". It was their little ones first birthday and so with grateful hearts we all gathered to celebrate Gracie during what is their weekly church that meets in their home.

During the course of the evening, Larry began to teach about the time in which John was in prison and he began to ask if Jesus was really who he said he was. Appropriate to what I was walking with in my own life, I absorbed every word. We began to discuss the story and began to discuss who John was and Jesus's response to questioning him. You would think it would be a negative one but instead, Jesus honored him and told John that he was the "Greatest man to have ever been born of a woman". So yes, even John had a moment when he asked "Lord, are you who you say you are?" When he did, our Lord honored him .. did not judge him. Doesn't that tell you something of the heart of our father!

As the evening progressed, their "family" asked if they could pray for me. They sat a chair in the middle of the room and each of them began to lay their hands on me to pray. First, in spanish, I heard sweet Lizzie stand before our Lord on my behalf. As each prayed, I was overcome in his love!

I rewind this story a little to tell you about a sweet girl who had called me and shared with me that she had recently been to her Rheumatologist .. a week prior to my house church visit. In her visit with Dr. Kempf, she shared with him just a small portion of my story. Without hesitation, he told her to have me call his office, that he'd be happy to see me. I was elated and overjoyed that just possibly the Lord was directing me ... and would finally do what I had prayed "reveal". I was also overcome by a friend, whom I don't share a lot of time with, being prompted to respond on my behalf in such a way! I did call the office and the receptionist on the other end knew just who I was. She told me right away that she had already scheduled me for their first available appointment, APRIL 26th! UGH .. so far off! She told me she'd put me on their "waiting list" in the event that something came up before. So I trusted and moved on.

The next day after house church, I went on like any other day .. doing the things that a Mom of 3 does. BUSY! At 3:00 that afternoon, the phone rang. Looking at the caller ID, I saw that it was the Rheumatology office that I had spoken with the week prior. As I answered, the girl on the other end said "Hi Mrs. Martine, we have an appointment that has come available, can you come in TOMORROW at 2:00". My eyes began to swell in tears .... "Of course, I can".

That call was like a love note from my Lord. It was just a little reminder that HE SEES ME, and he KNOWS EVERY DETAIL!

I went to that appointment and it went AWESOME! With assurance, Dr. Kempf felt he could rule out the big ones .. RA, Lupus, Fibromyalgia. He also felt that their was a big possibility that what I could be dealing with is something called "Reactive Arthritis" brought on by none other than yes, a virus! The other possibility could be "Post Viral Syndrom". He said that a few times a year he actually sees patients whom come in feeling like total crud .. for 6 months and even up to a year after a virus. He said they have arthritic like symptoms etc. He said, that a virus can settle into the joints and present itself as such. REALLY? WOW!
I felt so much peace in that Dr's office and left knowing .. the Lord finally had directed me to a place for HIS ANSWERS!

Dr. Kempf decided to do a small round of blood work and ordered a total body bone scan .. apparently, not just the Lord will see me now. HAHA. I did the scan this past Wednesday .. it took a LONG hour to do after receiving an injection of a radioactive isotope and waiting 3 hours for it to settle into my bony areas. I await those results with anticipation of good news. I am believing in the best. In the meantime, the Doctors office called to tell me that I had extremely LOW Vitamin D levels and guess what .... that that can in and of itself create bone pain and joint pain.
So, yes, the Lord directed my paths and is slowly revealing what I believe will be his answers. I am so encouraged to know about the Vitamin D and to be now taking prescription level doses that will help me be back on track. Praise the Lord for that!

I look back over the past few weeks and see how the Lord has done for me what he did for John. I found myself in the middle of this wilderness ... admittedly asking "Lord, are you who you say you are". And yes, the Lord in all that he is answered "Cristie, I see you, and my daughter born of a woman, I do not condemn you for your questions .. but honor your honesty in asking ... I AM who I say I am".